2020: "I was the most fucked up year in modern history..."
2021: "Here, hold my beer..."

Packing up my suitcase, getting ready to go to a friend's house for the holidays. First time in a long time I've had a place to go, but it's been a really strange year.

Funny how things work out. One day you're playing a game on-line doing an event, and somebody in the event with you likes your play style. They send you a friend request, and you start talking. A few weeks later, it starts raining ash on the both of you as the skies turn apocalyptic orange, and you realize that you live close by. Further discussions reveal you have similar personalities, likes and dislikes, as well as challenges.

A close bond forms, I meet other members of his family, end up basically being adopted by them all. Get invited over for Thanksgiving, a birthday celebration, a small trip to the lake, and now, the holidays.

Family. I never really knew what I was missing until now.

Spent the weekend in Tahoe for a friend's birthday. Had a really good time, even if it was only an escape for some fresh air.

Hoping for some fresh air with friends this weekend, celebrate someone's birthday, and not have an anxiety attack or freak out too much. We'll see how that goes 🤞

It's been about 9 months since the pandemic really changed the way people live their lives, at least in my area. We've also just gone through our first family-centric major holiday, Thanksgiving, under those restrictions.

A few acquaintances in my circles have recently reached out to me with a different perspective. Having spent so much time alone this year, and having not had anywhere they could go for the holiday, and realizing that there's people like me who are like that pretty much every year, I've seen some unique empathy coming from people who find themselves in this situation for the first time, finally realizing and understanding that, for others who don't have many people in their lives, this might actually be the normal thing.

I hope that empathy is something that persists, because family situations aren't something that change often, and there's many people every year who do have nowhere to go, no family to speak of, and struggle with personal relationships. Efforts made to understand their situations or reach out to include them (when they want to be included, but perhaps don't know how to ask) are hopefully going to get more common as a result of this. Humanity might emerge from this better than we went into it, in multiple ways.

Here's hoping, at least.

Microwave broke in the apartment last Friday. Oven died yesterday. Stove, don't fail me now! Seriously, apartment complex, I know you're understaffed right now, but I'm getting desperate with my food options.

I guess the downside of someone meaning the world to you is that when they're upset with you (even when it's their own fault), your world come crashing down around you...

It's at times like this when I honestly wonder why I bother... And then I remember the smiles, the laughter, and why I still bother comes flooding back again.

The only lingering question that never gets answered is if they feel the same way about me.

Between my trust issues and hating the concept of faith, acceptance of something absent of any evidence, this is why I find connecting with people difficult.

Standing in line to vote. Hope everyone else who can, is, or has. Not left or right, just forward.

Just finished episode 1 of Tonikawa which debuted a couple of days ago, and I swear I've seen this before years ago or a show that opened almost identically to it...

Either that or I'm losing my mind.

At this point I'm not sure which is more plausible, either.

Just finished the main storyline quests for Final Fantasy 14's current content patch, wrapping up the Shadowbringers expansion pack.

All I'm going to say is that all this smoke out here in California sure is making my eyes red and irritated 😭

Watching tonight's US Presidential debate... 

All I can say is that it's been a total Trumpster fire. I had low expectations going into this, but wow. Just wow.

For what it's worth, I don't really like Biden to begin with. His "Will you shut up, man?" was not something I would expect a politician running for the office of the President to say to another similar politician. That being said, the fact that it was -necessary- speaks poorly of the current sitting President, who is using the office to push a personal (not even a political, a *personal*) agenda for profit and power.

It seems both parties would rather hurt each other than do right by the nation's -entire- population. Dems don't care about Trumpers. Trump doesn't care about anybody but the wealthy. I feel like we're not even a nation, any more, but two different nations where only one makes the rules every election cycle. Nobody cares about the other side of the coin, which just further divides us.

I don't think Trump has failed us, I think the system has failed the nation by allowing an individual who clearly doesn't have the best interests of all the nation's people to be put into the position where he can exploit the system to cause chaos. The office shouldn't allow this, it's just too much power for a single person.

After 5 seasons, the anime Shokugeki no Soma has concluded. I particularly enjoyed it. Also felt the ending was rather satisfying.

Lego dragon is pretty cool. Shame the line to actually enter the Lego store was quite long.

Discussing sexual behaviour 

Sooooooo, my usual massage place has been closed since March and I'm delighted that they're open again as of this week.

Unfortunately, the business seems to have cut some corners and has opened a few services they previously didn't have (pretty sure about this, anyway). At least, it sure sounded that way in the room next to me when I went in for a massage tonight. I can understand some guys moaning slightly when their masseuse is doing their job quite well. The masseuse moaning slightly as well? Hmmmmmm. 🤔

Well. Things just got dark.

Taken 5 minutes ago. The 9AM Sun should not look like this.


Woke up at 3am from a nightmare. Usually start the day around 7am with a can of Monster yerba mate Dragon tea, but today felt like a coconut cream coffee day. Gonna be dragon arse, rather than dragon tea by the end of this afternoon. At least it's Wednesday already, but, so much for that recovery sleep last weekend.

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